Final Fantasy VII Ep. 8: Homecoming

In this episode we explore the world map, go to Kalm, learn about Cloud and Sephiroth, tag along with Sephiroth to Nibelheim, introduce him to Tifa, find Tifa’s house, play her piano, go through her stuff and steal her underwear. Hmm. Thanks for listening to First Encounter!

❗First Encounter contains adult themes such as violence, sexual content, and adult language. Listener discretion is advised.

View Uncorrected AI Interpreted Episode Transcript
Haney 0:00
This episode of first encounter contains spoilers for the video game Final Fantasy seven. If you have not played this game, first off, what are you doing? Don’t be like me. And second, go play instead of listening to us. We’d also like to take a second just to remind you that we are in no way shape or form affiliated with or sponsored by square. Just a couple of guys trying to have fun with a cool video game. All right, Bobby. No,

Chris 0:23
it’s time to leave Midgar it’s time to leave mid Gar. happening.

Haney 0:30
This is for you forever. Hey, I quit. I have a very serious question for you. Before we get started today, Chris, would you like to join my young buddies club?

Chris 0:41
Am I not? Am I not a member?

Haney 0:43
I think you’re the founding member of my young buddies club.

Unknown Speaker 0:54
Jesus Christ. How Hello,

Chris 0:56
can you open it? Can I open anticipations killing me. Hey, Hey, welcome back to the first encounter podcast I am joined by myself, Chris and my co host Hani he’s across from me across from him. If you go to my right he eventually comes around

Haney 1:19
the entirety of the earth to do that.

Chris 1:22
And today we’re talking about the hit spin off to the hot new game Kingdom Hearts Final Fantasy seven

Haney 1:28
Wow. Welcome Welcome back. Welcome. How’s it going?

Chris 1:32
It’s fine.

Haney 1:33
Yeah. Yeah, I was really looking forward to escape from the heaviness of the world right now and Oh boy, did I not get that

Chris 1:42
so this is going to be our third jump into wall market.

Haney 1:49
Actually just forgive my fucking fear all over myself.

Chris 1:53
Fuck. very dear listeners. It’s just you and me. No. Well, he cleans himself.

Haney 1:58
I only have a sweater don’t mop up the rest of the fucking much beer I saw I saw how you doing out there who won speaking of beer Chris. Let’s say you got there.

Chris 2:06
I got a bonus stage IPA by otter Creek Brewing Company. Very good. Very hoppy. Sweet. I like very delicious.

Haney 2:17
I was looking into this one primarily for this podcast because the first time I saw it, I had to pick it up because it has a like, old style video game can design it has like that space Demeter that’s kind of mimicking their looks like um, where instead of like the aliens, it’s Haas plants like 16 bit hot. But other than crispy and a fuck it’s a very delicious beer.

Chris 2:40
Yeah, classic Chris. Hey, hey.

Haney 2:43
Wow, so much happened today? Yeah, let’s get right into it. Because after eight minutes, I’m not getting right into it.

Chris 2:50
They want to know that. I feel like we’ve reached the point of the game where you are truly starting to be pulled in and enjoying it as much as I always have. Yes, I think I get it now. Like I get Yeah, this is your turning point. You understand?

Haney 3:07
I think the second half of what we played through today is really what sold it on me so let’s start with the for the first half so we can’t do that shit.

Chris 3:13
So we started the game off. Leaving mid er for the first

Haney 3:16
time. Yeah, so world map. We save the game on the world map last time right outside in mid guard. Right after read 13 and Barrett headed off to calm and we intended weaving cloud tiefen air to meet them there. I’m so excited. We’re not in Midgar anymore. Know what’s up with that world map. What’s up with that?

Chris 3:37
The world map you can see the world back. You have a map now there’s

Haney 3:41
this is mid guy just that little white dot next to my blinking red. That year the red dot? Yeah. And then that’s mid guy. Yeah. Huh.

Chris 3:49
Which means all of those white dots are other

Haney 3:52
areas. Is there random encounters on the world map? Oh, god damn it. Oh,

Chris 3:57
yeah.

Haney 3:58
I hate it. Oh, do what’s nice about the world map is I don’t have to hold down run. Just get to run. Oh, this is a really big God. Sandra Bullock. Chris, welcome to this.

Chris 4:12
Man. The party you started with was not the one I predicted you would leave with? Really? Yeah.

Haney 4:18
Who do you think I was gonna have?

Chris 4:20
I thought we were gonna keep Fred 13 I’ll be honest,

Haney 4:23
I kind of wish I had I also miss Barrett.

Chris 4:25
I yeah, that was my follow up. I’m surprised you ditch Barrett.

Haney 4:29
I love Barry so much.

Chris 4:30
Who’s your favorite character right now?

Haney 4:31
Ooh, shit. That’s a really hard question.

Chris 4:34
That’s what I’m here for.

Haney 4:36
Honestly, I really like aerith right now. Yeah, yeah, I just she has so much mystique about her. Like I just need to know more,

Chris 4:44
but still not as a romantic interest rate club.

Haney 4:48
I just really like Tifa. romantically. But that might just be me projecting my own romantic interest in Tifa on Cloud. This is the first time I got to explore the world map and actually see how fucking Much more of a world there is then just mid Gar The map is very large and there’s a lot of blips on it that I think are all explorable areas more than just mid guard which is very cool I knew kind of that we’d be leaving my guard at some point but I didn’t realize this like the the gravity of how large the this this earth is that we’re going to be exploring so that was really cool to see. We didn’t spend a ton of time exploring though we I want to get right into things so we headed northeast to the town of calm where we were meeting up with the rest of our party. So this is column I wonder if everyone’s there already. Let’s hurry over to the end. Let’s go cloud. Yeah, walk away by when you walk into the town, Eris and Tifa kind of on party from you and they’re like come on, everyone’s already in the end Let’s go meet them. And they run into the end and leave clouds under devices and I’m more characteristically any move I decided to explore the entirety of the town before going into

Chris 6:03
dm met a lot of nice folk.

Unknown Speaker 6:05
But this guy Dan, did you say that you came from mid Gaza? I used to live there too. But I heard they got lots of troubles lately.

Haney 6:17
Wow. The dog just ran out of like a closed door. What the fuck is happening here?

Unknown Speaker 6:24
Did you say that you came from? I used to live there too. But I bet they got all sorts of troubles the blade man

Haney 6:33
following you around his house screaming that at you. There really wasn’t a ton going on in this town in terms of like things to do or like stuff to find. So we did explore all the houses and talk to all the people but the fact I mean the only vn weekly leave Give me something hard. Trying to talk to this guy. My old man was a minor but he couldn’t get to work after monster started appearing in the middle mines. No, he doesn’t sit around getting drunk in the fog.

Unknown Speaker 7:01
And we’re back.

Haney 7:04
You know how we were leaving? The depression of bad guy behind

Chris 7:07
depression is a way of following you.

Haney 7:10
It seems there’s this group called avalanche running around but I guess soldier finally wiped them out. Okay. Hey, terrorists bombed Midgar reactor there have been a lot of dangerous accidents recently. I hate it just hate it. The thing that sticks out to me most is how much people love Shinra it’s actually pretty slick though. Like there’s some like people who are like yeah, shoot us everything. Like we wouldn’t be anything without Shinra and there’s some people who are like, well Shinra kind of sucks and they control everything but without them we wouldn’t have power so I guess we all just have to lie down and take it Shinra is trying to eliminate anyone who stands up to them it don’t matter if we like it or not shouldn’t has taken over and we got to live with it. Jesus. Okay, did you Rock the Vote? Go out and vote? Are you where you got thanks to Miko energy let’s pretty darn convenient thanks to Shinra Don’t you think

Chris 7:56
you’re full of it?

Haney 7:58
But I’d hate to think of what life would be like without myko energy. A little one a taught Megas energies made things a lot more convenient, but a lot of plants and animals have been disappearing at a rapid pace. Oh wow. This is suddenly relevant. I think the old life was better Don’t you think so?

Chris 8:15
Yeah, maybe?

Haney 8:17
Yeah, I’m sure I’m right. You think so don’t Yeah, yeah, I really do.

Chris 8:20
There’s gonna be a rift between this kid and his mom at some point.

Haney 8:24
It’s literally all my fault. Is that his chest? Get out the way kid. Let me get get getting your mom’s chest? No, I’d say no. Why not? I don’t think there’s actually I don’t think I can just Oh God, gosh, darn it.

Chris 8:40
I like the succulents though.

Haney 8:42
Both suck. We’re back. I think that would be my my rap name. Well, fuck it was it was just kind of interesting to see, you know, the, the intended politics of like, you know, this game? Yeah, 23 years ago is still very relevant, if not more relevant. Now, worldwide, particularly the environmentalism aspect of it. So a lot of the people you talk to her like, well, mining Maiko, is is kind of drying up the planet. And you know, we’re strip mining all the resources from the planet, but without it, we wouldn’t have material or power. So I guess it’s fine. Right, right. Right. And it’s kind of like, you know, where people? I’m sorry, listener, but like, you know, when you drive a car, and you’re like, filling it with petrol, and you’re like, yeah, this is probably fine. Like, I mean, I am not the main problem, right? Like if everyone’s doing it. I mean, we’re all the problem. We got to change. We got to stop this because we are literally letting general just come into fruition right now. Yeah. Um, today.

Chris 9:44
This episode is sponsored by, you know what? Calm down, buddy. I was gonna say what’s kind of interesting, interacting with people in this town. I don’t think I noticed that as much the other times I played, but it reminds me of like, the those talents that are so removed from like what’s happening in the world or the country like they kind of have an idea of what’s going on and what’s happening but it’s not like really affecting

Haney 10:10
them. It’s very similar to like an older movie trope from like the 80s where it’s like it’s not your problem until it comes into town. Is it true that Shinra makes monsters it’s true yeah well either way as long as he’s reactors you can’t stand up to Shinra Bach Jesus Christ This is actually like really scary rhetoric like really scary. Yeah. And very, I want to talk about another one we made that promised and I hear that the natural resources near the reactors are being sucked dry. Oh, oh fuck. We’re better off with the Maiko energy Oh god. One thing that I found interesting was they I don’t know that I noticed this in the garden I’m not sure that it was there but every home seemed to have this like kind of boiler makeup in there that I thought might be like a miniature Maiko reactor almost to power their homes and it kind of makes me think of like a propane tank versus a gas line so like in mid guard you’re like connected to the city so you have like a natural gas line running through your house or in this case a natural material on but like Like for instance where I live in the boonies of Vermont. I have a propane tank and have to have like fuel trucked in to me so like it kind of gave

Chris 11:21
me that vibe. Yeah, I didn’t pick up on that but it makes a lot of sense no idea if that’s

Haney 11:25
what’s going on. But that’s just kind of what I you know,

Chris 11:27
conjecture makes sense. fits in.

Haney 11:29
So this town Did you know it didn’t have a ton of interesting things going on in terms of story beats. We hit up the item shop. Oh, we did get a new source for cloud that I have not had a chance to equip yet because we’ve been living in the past in this episode. Yep. But much like the town Yeah. bulked up on some materia bots some items held man this is the items do I

Chris 11:53
have so much feel? do get yourself something nice kid.

Haney 11:57
What’s the club’s Earth magic? I don’t have that was this fucker. Weapons store. Hey, fucker. Hey, Buck yours. This is the weapons story. mill This is dope.

Chris 12:09
Hey, do you want to use not the Buster Sword anymore?

Haney 12:11
But it has three slots.

Chris 12:13
Holy shit. We’re swimming in slots. Now.

Haney 12:16
I wish I could compare this to the peacemaker I just picked up I guess I can’t right now I can’t because I don’t have bear and so if I go to the items, this is a thing.

Chris 12:25
Yeah. The fun thing about the cannonball is it’s not ranged he just kind of literally has a cannonball that he punches

Haney 12:31
people without I like the range. mithral clock. Can I pick that up? Full Metal staff, full metal staff? Full Metal staff? It’s bad. I know exactly what you’re new.

Chris 12:44
At work you You’re the

Haney 12:46
full metal staff, full metal staff.

Chris 12:50
Middle staff.

Haney 12:52
Okay. So after explaining the town and kind of just getting a little bit more information, we decided to head to the end. Hey, no, that’s cool all the time. Get the puck out of my way. I’m not calm anymore. I’m

Chris 13:06
running now.

Haney 13:11
Hello, Mr. Cloud. Your party is waiting for you on the second floor. Once in the end, we meet up with Eric Tifa. Read 13 and Barrett upstairs. You talk to the guy at the counter. And he’s like, oh, you’re Mr. Clark. Your party’s upstairs. Kristen. I thought Mr. Cloud was a very funny

Chris 13:30
we had a nice chuckle

Haney 13:33
pinkies out do chap. We we went upstairs and dove into some conversation I believe

Chris 13:41
so we get upstairs. And because cloud is the only one who seems to be connecting any dots at this point bear was like a fox going on. Tell us about it. What’s up with the headless spook in the chinar building Genova and right to talk at us.

Haney 13:57
So Cloud kinda is like, I guess I’ll tell you my story that me dot dot dot and sever off this seems like so long ago because so much happened. Yeah, like just so much happened from the point where cloud starts telling his story to where we end this episode. So fucking much exposition and story happens. It’s so good. You probably can hear me getting a little bit more excited about it as it comes out. But God dives into the story. It was like, I used to like want to be like Sephora. I worked with Sabra if I knew him, until that one day class starts talking about his backstory. And he delves into kind of the first time he really like went on a mission with Sephora off and that mission is to his hometown of niflheim

Chris 14:48
Sorry to keep you

Haney 14:49
waiting gets everyone’s here now. So let’s hear your story. You know, the one about Sephiroth and the crisis of the planet all but I’m so ready. I’m so ready, Chris.

Chris 15:01
I’m so ready for you to hear it

Haney 15:03
all.

Chris 15:07
I used to want to be like Sephora, so I joined soldier. After working with Sephora and several missions, we became friends.

Haney 15:15
You call that a friend? Yeah. Well,

Chris 15:18
he was older than me and hardly ever talked about himself. So I guess you’d call us war buddies. We trusted each other. Until one day, one day, after the war, it was soldier’s duty to put down any resistance against the Shinra. That was five years ago.

Haney 15:34
So clouds been in soldiers since he was he’s 21. We found out in the young Bobby’s room since since he is at least 16. Jesus Christ, that’s fucked up. Oh, fuck flashback. So we get a flashback of a kind of back of a caravan like a truck or something similar, with three Shin regards, one driving to in the back with you, as well as cloud and Safra. So you kind of have this view, from like the rear of the truck forward, you can see like a person driving it’s raining really heavily. And cloud says as much he kind of is looking at the back of the truck. He says, Wow, it’s raining really heavy. He walks around and talks to everyone in the truck. Sure is

Chris 16:13
raining hard.

Unknown Speaker 16:14
This is the first time we’ve seen Zephyr off on screen. Oh, fuck.

Haney 16:19
Is this blood all over the back of this? You see this?

Chris 16:23
Yes. Well, you know, it could be I guess if their job is putting down monsters, then? Oh, yeah.

Haney 16:28
Maybe they just throw in. Throw like bloody corpses in the back.

Chris 16:31
Hey, how are you doing? I’m all right. I wouldn’t know. I’ve never had motion sickness.

Haney 16:38
I love that they’re intentionally doing this, I’d like you just to like tease your cost a little bit about when you’re gonna get to talk to Sephora. And just like, let’s go counterclockwise or clockwise away from Sephora, and just talk to everyone who’s not set her up.

Chris 16:51
So Cloud is 16 at this point, and you get this personality from him. That’s very different from the rest of the time you’ve been playing as him,

Haney 16:59
right? It’s very fascinating because he is very youthful and energetic in a way that he’s not five years later, even though he’s only 21. It’s just a world of difference has happened between 16 and 21. And I, I don’t know like if I looked back at between, like, I know, I changed between 16 and 21. I don’t know if I would have had the same dramatic change that cloudsim does have between 16 and 21. Like I still feel like I was probably mostly who I was at 16 at the age of 21. But just a little bit, maybe a little bit more mature a little bit better. Still cooking. So we got through this kind of beginning of the caravan. You know, we talked to the first few guys not a big deal. And then Holy shit, we start talking to Sephiroth. And cloud is such a little nerve vampire about it. It’s adorable. Hey, settle down.

Chris 17:51
They gave me some new material. I can’t wait to use it as he doing

Haney 17:54
squats. Yeah. Just like a kid. You’re going

Chris 17:59
to brief us about this mission.

Haney 18:01
This isn’t a typical mission. Good. Why do you say that?

Chris 18:05
I joined soldier to be like you. But by the time I made first class, the war was already over. My big hopes of becoming a hero like you ended with the war.

Haney 18:14
I have thoughts about this already. Yeah. Alright. So one thing I want to point out is that the war was in high swing when an earth adopted mother. Elmira, right? Elmira. His husband was killed in the war. And we don’t know how long I don’t think we know how long it was going on before that point. So that was when Eric was like very young. Yeah, so the war was happening for like probably 10 ish years. Because at this point, you know, cloud is first class and he said by the time he got to first class the war was over. So I assumed Yeah, I don’t have like a coherent thought about it’s just like interesting to kind of piece together. Yeah, but the other thing that I definitely want to touch on is the purification of sefer off into like, I always find it very disturbing when kids are like, I’m disappointed that the war’s over because I wanted to be like you and like, I’m always like, a little bit happy if the person is just like, What the fuck is wrong with you? Like you don’t want to be like me. I’m not a hero. Like I kill people kind of thing. You know, like, yeah, I feel like that for us. Probably more on that side of the like, I’m not a hero. Like don’t look up to me, but we’ll see.

Chris 19:20
That’s why I always sign up wherever there’s a big mission kind of a way to prove myself. Say how do you feel mister? Mister suffering? Yeah,

Haney 19:27
don’t don’t forget that emphasis. I thought you wanted a briefing. Our mission is to investigate an old and make our reactor. There have been reports of it malfunctioning and producing rudl creatures. First we Will dispose of those creatures then we’ll locate the problem and neutralize it. Brutal creatures were the maker reactor at niflheim nimble home.

Chris 19:52
That’s where I’m from. Oh,

Haney 19:54
pa Oh, My God, exposition Park, I completely forgot that clouds not from mid guard shit, huh? hometown. He’s like, Alright kid. There’s two things we got to go check out. There’s a monster that’s been terrorizing the town and there’s a mega reactor that’s on the fritz and nearby in this town. So stage one, find the monster Slayer at stage two, go to the reactor, fix it. Basically, we kind of have an easy time with a monster, because suddenly the truck hits it. And the Shinra guy driving turns around and says Mr. synchronoss, we hit something unknown. And sem rush just kind of stands up and he’s like, well, that’ll be our monster. He’s so cool. It breaks into a battle there was fucking you get to control cloud alongside Zephyr off. You’re fighting a fucking dragon. Oh, sir.

Chris 20:55
Something strange just crashed into the truck.

Haney 20:59
That would be our monster.

Unknown Speaker 21:02
Fight. Do I get a fight with Oh. Oh no. Damn it. I’m so excited. Oh, I am so excited. Oh my god. I get to fuck.

Haney 21:17
I’m fighting a fucking dragon with Sephiroth right now and it took him two fucking hits to kill it.

Chris 21:23
It’s just a chance for them to be like Hey, look at what you suck next to Zephyr off

Haney 21:28
the other thing that’s nice about this point is your level one Yep, five years ago Yep, that makes me feel a lot worse about only being like level 13 I might be 15 No

Chris 21:37
No You’re much higher you’re past 20 at this point, I think so. We’ll have to check the grind and put in a little beep noise here while we check the Save File not gonna do that

Haney 21:50
that’s different Chris

Chris 21:51
so you’re still level five

Haney 21:58
we we get into this fight with a dragon and you’d like take one hit at it and it’s like you did 140 damage and you’re like yeah, hell yeah did

Chris 22:05
you did 14 damage Oh

Haney 22:07
boy. 140 S Class hv That’s right. Yeah, I’m like yeah, you did 14 damage. Tight, tight, tight tight. Looking Safra takes two attacks against the dragon each well over 3000 3000 right for just a sword attack. No magic used in this fight. Dragon dies, monsters lame. And baby. Cool.

Chris 22:31
his stance is so cool.

Haney 22:33
in tight Oh, he’s so cool. It’s unreal. The other thing that I found interesting about this point was he actually given to see how big massive Monet is in comparison to the Buster Sword. Cuz like everyone’s like, oh, the Buster Sword. It’s a comically large sword. Which it is it is it for sure it is but I think it’s more of the girth rather than the length. What’s the matter guys? Look me in the eyes. I’ll talk to you about girth. And like,

Chris 22:56
tell me about the girth.

Haney 22:59
So the girth is goddamnit I broke. So the girth of the Buster started is quite quite large. But the length isn’t, I guess, too absurd is really ridiculous. But it’s not as absurd as Macedonia which appears to be well over five feet in length as a skinny Katana blade. My favorite thing is how fuck does he draw that? Yeah, like I would love to watch like, and Hey, listen, if there’s a video that someone’s made on, like YouTube or anything of someone like making the sword and trying to draw it, please send it to us because that’d be hilarious to watch.

Chris 23:34
I mean, in the chinar Tower, when you find the sword cloud does say Sephiroth is the only one who’s able to wield

Haney 23:40
that rescue. And after watching him Yeah, sure, yeah, as it adds up. So we beat the monster with very little impact of anything. And he pull up to a town and kind of see Sephora sending the shinar guards off to his side and then you’re like kind of looking over his shoulder. Once you hit the town. He’s like, how’s it feel to be back in a hometown and cause like, fine, I guess and I was like, I wouldn’t know I don’t have a hometown and asked me about myself. What about your parents and stuff? I was like my mom’s Genova. Fucking Mike drops. How does it feel? It’s your first time back to your hometown in a long time, right? So this town looks real fuckin abandoned. So how does it feel? I wouldn’t know because I don’t have a hometown. Jesus.

Chris 24:41
How about your parents?

Haney 24:43
My mother has to know. Fuck, that’s the apostrophe s. Oh, no, she really? My mother is Genova. She died right after she gets fucked. I’m just remembering something from fucking Advent Children. It’s Genova they’re looking for right the like the Turks and they’re like where’s mother? I mean you can’t say anything obviously, but I remember someone’s screaming where his mother was like that’s weird. My mother is Genova she died right after she gave birth to me my father to us. Oh, he’s laughing that’s not good. Oh boy. I’m very upset headshake What does it matter? All right, let’s go. The makeup smells pretty bad here. I had flashbacks to watching Advent Children at this point and remembered the Turks fighting cloud on motorcycles and screaming Where’s mother? All I remember

Chris 25:41
you’re combining so many characters in your head. You love it? Yeah. Fantastic. I can’t wait to watch Advent Children again. Oh, I’m

Haney 25:48
so sorry. But um, back to the sefer off kind of dropping the bomb about Genova being his mom it clicked a couple of things together so last episode I noticed that cloud was having his little bit of a mental panic in front of Jehovah’s tank in the Shinra building he says separates Apostrophe S and it stuck out to me because it’s weird and it kind of click that and lo Where’s mother thing from adventure children from fucking way back in my mind when your mother mother and I was like oh shit that’s right like I feel like I knew that deep down in my heart somewhere that Genova was maybe it’s that broth mom, but I don’t know what like it must have been part of that the children the fucking whatever storyline that was aside from being crystal caves. We thought about the vampire data in this game prior to coming into it, so that process my mom’s name is Genova. So he he believes at this point that his mom was a woman named Genova, who died shortly after his birth, probably told to him by his dad, and then he doesn’t seem to care for his dad very much or prospective not really sure. That’s just kind of inference. And then at that point is that Frost is kind of like Yeah, whatever. Anyway, let’s, uh, let’s go and hang out at the end for the evening and we’ll get started in the morning. By the way, you can go hang out with your family and friends. Go like visit the town, talk to your family, and you’re like, Hey, cool.

Chris 27:06
The time was quiet. Everyone must be in their houses afraid to come out because of the monsters? No, maybe they’re afraid of us.

Haney 27:16
We leave for the reactor at dawn. Make sure you get to sleep early. That’s the fucking well.

Chris 27:21
Yeah.

Haney 27:22
Wait. Fuck did we see a flashback of tifus father with Sephiroth sword in his backup. Oh no. Are we about to Oh no. Oh shit crass. All we need is one lookout so you others get some rest. Oh, and you may visit your family and friends. I think the first the first thing we did was go into the end just to kind of get a feel for what was going on. See if I can talk to sappy isn’t in. Yeah, holy is booked up by Shinra for the night.

Unknown Speaker 28:01
That you cloud? Do My Own guys deceive. Must have been to say you really moved up in the world being under several Fs command. What a guy. Yeah. We’ve talked to you a person to the left of the Anki brain and that person’s name is

Chris 28:20
Zan Gan. Gan is Anki.

Haney 28:24
We find out is a martial arts master who travels the world and teaches martial arts to children. Which isn’t weird. Don’t make it weird listener.

Chris 28:33
I was gonna say Sign me up for that. But then you made it weird.

Haney 28:36
I didn’t make it weird. I said don’t make it weird specifically. In to are you princess? I’m saying again. I travel around the world teaching children martial arts. What I’m job. I am 128 students all over the world in this town, a girl named t plus my students. Joe so this is t plus master. Yeah. What’s it? Yeah, I

Chris 29:01
said what a baller. Oh,

Haney 29:02
it’s such a bolo.

Chris 29:03
Did you say Tifa? Tifa has

Haney 29:05
good sense. She’ll be a powerful fighter. Oh, you know how you cartwheel over people?

Chris 29:11
If I could? I would.

Haney 29:13
I want to see some Shinra techniques and if you see anything you can use you might want to incorporate some of my techniques. Well, good luck finding teach me some techniques motherfucker. We had upstairs and find Zephyr off just chilling in his room ish kind of thing like looking out the window and he’s just like, you gotta we gotta be up early tomorrow you ready for bed? And you can either say like, yeah, ready for bed or not? Yeah, instantly early. We just still early options. I assumed they would continue the story aggressively if we chose the other option. So we tried to go to the mountains

Chris 29:48
couldn’t rotifers dad was hanging out

Haney 29:50
there and we talked to you to his dad. This mansion, this mansion, this mansion, full metal mansion.

Chris 29:57
The now I’ll come here later. Hey, Metal mansion

Haney 30:01
full metal mansion. Huh? You from Shinra

Chris 30:04
That’s right. Who are you?

Haney 30:06
I’m the town’s dots. dots. Aren’t you cloud? Don’t you know me? Got that your teeth? Right? Um, teeth as father. Stay away from my dad. It’s just a dad.

Chris 30:20
Just be a dad. Just do your dad voice.

Haney 30:24
I once I just got to get in the zone, barbecue grill and

Chris 30:28
can you smell it?

Haney 30:30
Can you smell what the dad is cooking? Stay away from my daughter. We don’t need the Shinra has helped to protect our town fucked up ahead is mountain devil he’s like the my fucking daughter along cloud is a really tested out it about like her involvement at all with soldier in general. It seems like and I’m sure that turns out extremely well for him. That attitude. So yeah, we’ll touch on

Chris 30:53
that thing. Join us on the next episode to see how tips dead ends up

Haney 30:57
how they make this episode. We’re gonna talk about that in like 20 minutes.

Chris 31:00
Stay tuned listeners.

Haney 31:04
So we, we get kind of cussed out by teeth, his dad and then we’re like, hey, let’s go check out more buildings. So we check out clouds mom’s house slash clouds house and he’s like, my mom was a barren woman. She was always just like, just the same. Like it had been two years since I last sorry, but she was just the same woman. Then she died a few days later. Oh, no, this is.

Chris 31:26
This is my house. It has nothing to do with what happened five years ago.

Haney 31:32
Yo, wait, I want to hear me too. It’s been a long time. Right? Tell us more. You saw your family. Right? All right. Yeah, I fucking want to know.

Chris 31:41
I don’t know if you’d call it a family. My father died when I was still young.

Haney 31:45
I thought that dad sounds interesting.

Chris 31:48
That’s why my mom lived alone in this house. Yeah, I saw my mom. My mom. She was a vibrant woman hadn’t changed at all. But a few days later, she died. Fuck her. When I saw her. She looked fine. Ah.

Unknown Speaker 32:05
She was poisoned by the funny smell and make up my mind.

Haney 32:09
Mama cloud.

Chris 32:11
Hi, mom.

Haney 32:12
That’s weird. You look so handsome. There’s that like, and then the white and now he’s suddenly sitting on the stairs. So is this a soldier uniform? Mom, I okay, happened again. My how you’ve grown up, let the girls never leave you alone. I’m worried about you. There are a lot of temptations and

Unknown Speaker 32:36
I feel a lot better if you just settle down with a nice girlfriend.

Chris 32:40
I’m all right. You should have

Haney 32:43
an older girlfriend one that’ll take care of you. I think that would be best for you. Another flash and now we’re at a different point. Are you eating right?

Chris 32:52
All right. company takes care of me.

Haney 32:55
Is that so? I know you can’t cook. I’ve been worried sick about you. Cloud. It’s happening again like rapidly, you know cloud. Oh boy. Isn’t that right cloud? Oh boy. Always be your mother. This is really upsetting.

Chris 33:11
Let’s stop this.

Haney 33:12
I think that was clouds mind just like not being able to comprehend or like get back to that point. I’m sure cloud has a very healthy mental Yeah, he

Chris 33:21
seems really good It seems real mentally stable.

Haney 33:23
So you kind of just see like several flashes of cloud some other kind of worrying about him saying like he I wish he wouldn’t be in soldier like I wish he would just you know settle down with a nice girl you should find someone older than you who can care for you. You can use like, it’s time for you to just chill out like I can’t like you can’t cook Are you eating? Well, like just kind of, for the most part typical worrying moms. And it’s just kind of like several flashes do that and then it starts flashing faster and faster and faster. And then clouds finally just like I can’t like it’s too much. Like, I thought the flashes were weird at first like weird like, Oh, it’s just like gaff says Mario, I think he’s just kind of, you know, trying to move past it because it’s not definitely has passed away at this point. So he was basically just raised by a single mom, seemingly no siblings, just him and his mom. And it was his It was really good. It was just, it was a lot to take in. Yeah, NASA. We got to take the test. And he was like, you went to my house and you’re like, Sure. Sure did. And then you kind of poke around on the first floor. I don’t find much and you go upstairs and she’s like, you went upstairs. She’s like, Sure did. And then you like poke around in some other rooms and he gets to his room. It’s like, you went to my room? He’s like, Yeah, I did and poke around and he’s like investigating her bed and then you find a letter on her. He

Chris 34:45
plays the piano.

Unknown Speaker 34:46
Oh, I didn’t play the piano. She’s like did you play the piano cloud and

Haney 34:49
you get the octaves is like, like in jammed out or like that, played it a little and then I chose I played it. A little Club tries to play a scale doesn’t quite play it right.

Chris 35:03
Did you play my piano? Yeah, jam Just a little. I can read sheet music too, you know, Do re. Mi. T.

Haney 35:16
That’s all right. T.

Cloud. Did you read the notes on my desk?

Chris 35:31
Yeah, I did. I read it. It was a letter addressed to Tifa from the son of the guy that runs the general store.

Haney 35:38
Tifa How are you? I just arrived in mid gun eight days ago. Yesterday,

Unknown Speaker 35:43
all of the nibble. Haim got together to welcome me the only person that we couldn’t get ahold of with Cloud. But everyone said he wasn’t really that close to us. So even if we asked, he probably wouldn’t have come anyway. well enough about him. Midgar is really something. But to tell you the truth, I feel so behind on everything. So out of it. Even the rooms of people in the slums are clean. Right now I’m living in the slums, but I plan to move to a really nice room, like the ones I’ve seen in magazines once I make some money, but to do that, I guess I’ll have to find a job first. That’s right. I still haven’t found a job yet. You know, in eight days, calf is fine, dude. I lied to my parents and told them that I found a great job was Shinra Inc. I wonder if it’s too late to go back. Sometimes I think I should have taken over my parents store. I just made it here to mid God, but all I think about is nibble. Haim? And Tifa. Is that stupid old water tower still working? The old man at the end doing well? Are my parents still at the shop every day? Have any monsters attacked? And most of all, how are you? Tifa It feels like I haven’t seen you for years. We’re all talking about you last night. Everyone likes you, but because everyone idolizes you, I can very well stabbed them in the back. I always acted cool, but actually, I was just afraid of being jilted. Wow, if I keep running like this, this Will become a love letter. So I think I’ll stop there. Take care. All right, again. PS write me back. Okay.

Chris 36:58
Weird letter.

Unknown Speaker 37:00
Feels important. After we finished reading the

Haney 37:04
letter, we decided to go well, all I was doing was president actually, don’t bring me into this. all I was doing was pressing the x all around the room wasn’t really sure what was gonna happen and press X against t Bo’s wardrobe. Did you look at my clothes cloud

Chris 37:19
received orthopedic underwear? What the fuck did I just receive? orthopedic underwear? Why? orthopedic underwear. Cloud. It’s true. Just kidding. Don’t get mad.

Haney 37:35
100% is true. Tifa.

Cloud, we’re talking about something really important here. I really hope when I go look at my inventory. I have orthopedic underwear, fucker, orthopedic underwear. So we got some orthopedic underwear teeth is like cloud Come on, did you really and cause like, yeah, they’re mine. Like I kept them just stuck them in his back pocket. I am still kind of move on. But what the hell? Um, one thing I need to do now that we’re back in the in the current time is check my inventory and see if I have a key item there that I was not expecting. because that’d be hilarious. And also really weird. So from teeth this house, we kind of leave and I think that was the last test. No,

Chris 38:19
there was one more house and it was a woman with two children. Oh, yeah.

Unknown Speaker 38:24
And they’re like, oh, you’re proud of soldier. Oh, I’m sorry. It’s you cloud. I didn’t recognize you.

Chris 38:30
Cloud Shinra chin bra, bra soldier.

Unknown Speaker 38:41
The fuck is happening south. Are you going to kill the bouncers?

Chris 38:49
Are you going to

Haney 38:51
probably clap you’ve grown up to be a strong man. Thanks, dude. No leave because your kids are creeping me the fuck out. So I think the last thing I can do is go back to the Sephiroth and go to sleep. How it goes down for the night. He takes a nap set for us like hey, I’m not waking up in the morning like you better be on time.

Chris 39:13
Next time on first encounter Will play to the end of clubs memory and get ready to leave calm. Thanks for listening and we’ll see you then.

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